The Energy of the Mind

One way to begin to work with thoughts in mindfulness practice is to sense the energy of the mind, in much the same way that we feel into the energy of the body in yoga practice. You can notice if the energy moves quickly or slowly, For some, using the imagine of a river can be useful. You might imagine yourself seated on the bank of a river, watching as the river flows by. The river as the activity of the mind.

Experiencing yourself as witnesser in this way helps loosen the grip, the habit so many of us have, of over identifying with our thoughts. We begin to see that thoughts come and go much like waves on water. Getting used to the arising of thought without the immediate reaction that often accompanies it, is priceless.

It can take some time to get used to watching the energy of thought without paying so much attention to the content. Bringing that foundational attitude of curiosity, really helps. If you are working with the image of the river, open your senses to the visualization. Let it be vivid. Another image that can help is that of a waterfall. The waterfall is the ceaseless flow of though and sensory input, you can imagine yourself behind the waterfall, watching, witnessing in that same way, the energy of the mind.

I remember pretty clearly the moment when I really understood that I am not my thoughts, when I understood it not with my mind but from that mysterious space of the witnesser. I was a young person who lived very much in my mind and most of the time, my mind was a very unhappy place to be. The freedom that I felt, when I realized that what moves through my mind means very little about me… . well, if that is the only taste of enlightenment I ever get, it is enough.

Take good Care.

Wholeheartedly,

Kim

The importance of grounding

Our meditation practice can be so helpful when the world feels out of control, as it so often does these days. When things are going the way we hope or expect them to go, we have an illusion of control. When the storms hit, that fragile image is shattered and we can be left feeling destabilized .

In these times, taking even just a few moments to feel into the body, especially into the places where the body connects to the Earth ,can really help our nervous systems re-regulate or down regulate as it is often called. When our nervous system is anxious or over active (in yoga we call this rajasic), our rational brain goes off line. I am sure we have all experienced the consequences of what happens in those moments. A practice as simple as bringing your awareness into your feet, feeling the solidity, the support of the ground beneath you can help begin to bring the nervous system back toward balance and the rational brain back online.

I am often surprised by how quick this transition back can be once you find the practice that really feels right for you. For some it is touching the Earth in some way. For some it could be as simple as a hand on the heart or face. The touch that signal to your system that it is cared for. For some it might be deep steady breathing that draws them down from the energy of the head and back into the felt experience of the body- the body which always exists in the present moment. Thinking mind moves fluidly from past to future. Body stays in the present and can be your guide back whenever you get lost.

I often turn to standing practice when I feel unsettled energetically, especially when I am out in the world. I have a strange aversion to grocery stores. For whatever reason, I often get a swell of existential ennui when I am in a big store. Maybe the lights , maybe the disconnection from our food that feels exacerbated by everything in packages, prepared and frozen. It all seems a bit wrong and it takes a lot of energy for me to stay with it, to remain engaged and open with those I come in contact with. When I stand in line, I feel my feet. I let the Earth support me, steady me. My eyes are open. No one knows that in that moment I am actually meditating. My senses are open, mind soft and moving, I can speak and interact but all the time I am being bolstered by the strength of the earth and the courage of a heart willing to ask for help, even when it suspects that the discomfort it is feeling is a little silly.

Take some time to find the things that help you feel grounded and supported. Your nervous system will thank you!

Wholeheartedly,

Kim

Experiencing from the Inside out

To know ourselves as space, as consciousness, in stillness is a revelation. What is whole in us exists in the clear spaces of our awareness. There is a unified, fundamental, innate quality of presence that we do not create. A quality of being that is not influenced by the causes and conditions that make up much of our human experiences.

The interesting thing is that when you are embodied, when you experience your body fully, the body becomes at the same time, no longer separate from the rest of the world around us. When you really bring your awareness inwardly, you begin to see that the present moment is happening both inside and outside of the body simultaneously.

One thing that I have found that has shifted in me as a result of this understanding, is the way I interact with and connect to the world. I feel an interconnection, that I am a part of all that moves around me. When something happens, even something painful, I am less likely to feel the part of the victim, more likely to feel a shared concern or care or grief. I care about the world more, because the world is also me. I may have understood this intellectually on some level before. There is now more of a felt experience of it. The quality of being not separate. Perhaps this sounds a bit esoteric but in simple terms it is a way of experiencing your life that is deeply satisfying. It doesn’t need to be a cognitive contemplation but instead a touching in to a fundamental truth. Living the moments of your life as fully open, alive, and whole as possibie, is a dream I find worth trying to experience!

If you feel drawn to work, you might look into the work of Judith Blackstone.

Wholeheartedly,

Kim

Exploring different Anchors in meditation

We often use the breath as our anchor in meditation. The breath is always available and for most people it works really well as the focal point of practice. It is not the best anchor for everyone all the time however. For example, for some experiencing anxiety, focusing on the breath, especially on the sensations in the chest, can be difficult. It can be really useful exploring different ways of anchoring, so that you have just the tool you need as your needs change day to day.

There are innumerable options in choosing an anchor. You can work with a particular place or sensation in the body. You can work with the eyes open, finding a focal point to steady your gaze. One of my teacher’s loves to stare at a candle flame. You can also use a sacred image or any image that holds meaning for you. It can take some practice finding the same sense of presence with the eyes open, but if you think about it, cultivating this ability creates another bridge between our formal practice and our daily lives. In my own practice, I prefer to have my eyes closed, but I spent time sitting with a Korean Zen group where practice was done with eyes open, staring at the wall in front of us. At first, I felt restless. Like I just wasn’t able to drop in, to really feel into my practice. Over time, I found that I was absolutely able to arrive in that same deep place. It also showed me that the inward awareness and outward awareness are not separate. I just need ALOT more practice and maybe many more lifetimes before I will be able to connect as easily, and with the same quality in that outward focus.

Changing your anchor can also help if you find your practice getting a bit stale or if you are struggling with sleepiness or boredom. Keeps you on you mental toes:)

Get creative, explore, play. That is something I need to remind myself of constantly.

Let me know what anchors you explore and how they work for you!

With Metta,

Kim

Self Compassion

I used to have a very unkind voice in my head that liked to comment on nearly everything I did, every experience I had. She spoke to me in ways that were often devastating, that broke me down and made me feel like I would never be good enough at anything.

In practice, we call this the inner critic. Some have a more ferocious one than others, but there are ways of working with it and even embracing it.

Something that can be helpful for some people, is to give your inner critic a name, or create a character for it. This can give you a solid way or relating as you work to understand where this critic might be coming from. You can make it funny or silly if you like, encouraging yourself not to take it so seriously. For me, what worked best, was to relate to this voice as my young self. As I began to work with her in this way, I could see all the hurt and fear behind every critical thing she said to me. I could sense all the false messages that she had absorbed from the people (and culture) around her. These things she said were not even things she really believed. As my understanding grew, I was able to bring compassion to her. To let her know that I was sorry someone had made her feel that way. It didn’t take very long of offering her my genuine love and care before she changed. She is just as likely to offer me encouragement and root me on as she is to criticize me out of fear these days.

It is so important to become aware of and adjust the way we treat ourselves internally. How we speak to ourselves creates a tone, a mood and that permeates our lives, our relationships with others. It colors the way we see the world. It hardens into action. It becomes our reality.

You deserve kindness. That kindness must come first from yourself. Others can inspire you, remind you, show you the way back to your own heart. Compassion is part of your true nature. It often get covered over with bad conditioning but it is there. Waiting for you. Longing for you. Loving you.

Wholeheartedly,

Kim

If you would like to explore self compassion further, I highly recommend checking out the work of Kristin Neff.

Working with the Senses

The senses are the way in which we engage with the world, inwardly and outwardly. When we do not have a conscious relationship with the senses, they have a way of pulling us from desire to aversion in an endless cycle of distraction.

When, however, we engage with the senses from a place of inner connection and intention, they hold the possibility of enriching our lives and even connecting us with our truest nature. Whatever we turn our awareness toward has a way of blossoming. That might manifest as compassion in the face of suffering (our own or that of another). When awareness turns toward the senses, we begin to find beauty in unexpected places. The small things that often drift by unnoticed or even get labeled a frustration by practicality can shift. An example from my own practice and life, is in the way I relate to the wind. I love to watch the trees move in the wind, graceful and unafraid. I could watch them for hours. Even more, I love to stand outside in the wind. To feel the invisible force push against me. I even love the way the intense cold of a strong wind has a way of penetrating straight into my bones. I stand in the wind, arms out, laughing and feeling in some ways closer to god (or creation, or nature, the divine, the universe… whatever you want to call it) then at nearly any other time.

The senses can pull you out of your life or make your life really FEEL like the precious gift that it is. They are worth learning to be in conscious connection with!

Why am I reaching again for the brushes?

When I paint your portrait, God,

nothing happens.

But I can choose to feel you.

At my senses’ horizon

you appear hesitantly,

like scattered islands.

Yet standing here, peering out,

I’m all the time seen by you.

The choruses of angels use up all of heaven.

There’s no more room for you

in all that glory. You’re living

In your very last house.

All creation holds its breath, listening within me,

because, to hear you, I keep silent.

from The Book Of Hours

by Rainer Maria Rilke